Dads can keep the peace... by leaving childcare to mum

Dads, if you want to avoid rows with your wife, play with the children but let her do the caring.

Although many fathers would say they are often in trouble for doing just that, a study suggests that couples have a stronger relationship when the father spends more time playing with their child.

But when he participates in care-giving – such as giving baths – parents undermine each other.

Couples have a stronger relationship when the father simply sticks to playing with the children

The study involved 112 couples, most of whom were married, and who had a four-year-old child.

Fathers and mothers filled out questionnaires which asked how often they played with their children and how often they were involved in care-giving activities.

Researchers then observed the couple while they helped their child draw a picture of their family and build a house out of blocks.

The U.S. researchers looked for signs of supportive co-parenting, and for evidence of couples criticising each other’s parenting or trying to ‘outdo’ each other.

A year later, the couples returned and took part in a similar activity.

The results, reported in the Journal of Developmental Psychology, showed that when fathers played more with their child at the beginning of the study, the couple showed more supportive co-parenting in the second session.

But when fathers said they participated more in care-giving, the couples showed lower levels of supportive co-parenting a year later.